http://www.mylot.com/w/keywords/relationship+advice.aspx MyLot Discussions About relationship advice en-gb http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1437459.aspx I've never had any major problems in my past relationships but this current relationship that I'm in is really killing me. My girlfriend is really Moody! One moment she's lovey dovey and the next minute she's angry or maybe more like irritated as hell. I like to joke around for the most part but sometimes she just takes things too seriously and so I sometimes find myself having to pull back my tongue or think before I say something just so that our day won't turn to hell. I'm starting to get irritated myself at times because of her behavior and I'm really lost as to how to deal with this situation. We have our good days but for the most part, every day turns into a bad day because she always has something to complain about. I'm fed up! Help me people! Sun, 16 Mar 2008 01:30:12 GMT cmkdc33 http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2158886.aspx I am a great listener and I guess sometimes too nice. Most of my friends always come to me for advice. Usually its always relationship advice. I have several friends that only talk to me when they're going through something with their relationship and need to vent and get advice on what to do. Half the time I wonder if they really listen to me when I give them my advice. Recently a friend of mine came around, hadnt talked to him in like a year, telling me his gf and him are having issues. She would never let him go anywhere and he always had to 'report' everything he did while she was at work. Of course this was all one-sided, so I couldnt really give complete advice, besides taking the facts. He was unhappy, she's cheated on him several times and he'd take her back. I kept telling him if he's not happy he needs to move on. He needs to get his old friendships back and get out there and start having fun again. The hardest part for him, besides his love for her, was that they have a child together. Long story short, this was the last time she cheated on him because he finally took my advice and moved on. Recently I found out he is now going back to school, and is dating one of my best friends! He's finally happy. That made me happy to know that he took that step. Does anyone else ever give out advice, hoping its good and that it helps? If so, what was your outcome? Or if you wana just tell a story... Sat, 17 Oct 2009 12:10:27 GMT Laur25 http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2030145.aspx I'm going on a date tomorrow with this girl who I met last weekend, a friend of a friend. We've been chatting on the phone and msn and she's added me to facebook. On here facebook, over the week shes been uploading pics of her and this guy she spends a lot of time with, who I found out yesterday was her ex. In the pics they're kissing and cuddling and this kinda put me off because she's been chatting n flirting with me and she's the one who suggested we should go on a date. So yesterday I asked her about it and she said that they were just good friends while they're single and if she gets with me she won't be seeing him. The today she said before we meet I want to tell you something. She said, I have a tattoo of my ex's name (the same ex whos in all the pics). She said I just wanted to be honest with you... which I was greatful about and respected. Now alarm bells are going off and I'm just wondering if you think I should be bothered by it? In a previous conversation she has said that they hadn't been a couple since Jan. But when I asked her when she got the tat, she said she go i in Feb. This and the way they are together is really putting me off. Maybe I should just not be so seriously and meet up with her and have fun. But I'm looking for a serious relationship really. Do you think a tattoo of some else's name would bother you? Or am I over reacting? Fri, 05 Jun 2009 13:55:54 GMT 4ftfingers http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2165720.aspx As some of my mylot friends knows my daughter had her baby girl this past Jan , with a guy she was living with, they lived together for 1 year and 4 months. Well we have a bit of a situation because of that relationship . I will tell you a little about it then I would like some input on how you would feel and what you might have done different. Aarikas boyfriend (common-law hubby I guess) Kicked her and the babies out of the house they lived in and they moved in with us for awhile. Well when Mattie finished school in May they decided to move to the town their employment was in . Aarika let Joey(father of her baby girl) move in with them to help pay the bills . He started drinking quite a bit and one night got drunk and came in being a jerk he picked up Baby Sophia and was staggering around with her and stumbling and wouldn't let Aarika have her back . Anyway to make this a bit shorter he ended up kicking Aarika in the face and chest that night , the cops were called but they didn't take him to jail and she didn't press charges on him (I think she should have). They ended up not being able to stay in the house they lived in because the rent and bills were just too high( he hasn't paid any support for the baby either) . They Ended up moving in temporarily with one of their friends , until they could find a bigger place. Well a couple of their friends moved in with them so they could all share the rent on this place. Joey comes to her and says my mom is driving me crazy and I dont have anywhere else to go. can I stay a few days . Of course She said okay. He told her when he got paid he would start making support payments on Sophia . This pay day was a few days away. The night before he would have gotten paid he got mad at her and hit her in the face and shoved her out of the pick- up they were in when it was barely stopped. Later that night a couple of her friends and her was going to go get some of clothes and the kids clothes that was in Joeys truck . Well they parked away from where he was staying and the boys went to get the stuff , well when they were on their way back to the other town they lived in they told her her they beat his truck up. I think it was wrong for them to do that, because it should have been confronting him not his truck . Am I wrong? Well one of the boys was arrested and spent 2 weeks in jail. Then they arrested the other one and then Aarika. They both ended up staying 2 weeks in jail as well.All 3 of them are on probation and have to make restitution. I felt bad because she had to be there for so long away from the Babies , but even if i had the money I don't think I would have bailed her out. I have seen too many people bailing their kids out over and over again and it doesn't seem to teach them anything at all. Now as a parent am I wrong in believing that bailing them out hurts them more in the long run? I didn't bail the oldest boy out the one time he got into trouble and he hasn't ever gotten into any more trouble. So have you or would you bail out your child? would you leave them there ?.. Cause darn it she should have listened to her Mama..lol Sun, 25 Oct 2009 19:59:07 GMT jeanena http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1221300.aspx I'm at a crossroads and not sure what to do. I've been with my bf for three years now and I am planning on leaving in about two months. I don't know if I will come back. I care about my bf but it's not enough. Here's the thing. I never got over my first love. Breaking up with my ex has been my biggest regret in my life. I broke up with him 10 years ago and there's not a day that goes by that I don't think about him. How can I still be with my bf when all I can think about is my ex? There are some things about my bf that I don't want to put up with anymore. We get along fine but I feel I can't totally love him because my ex is still in my heart and always will be. The last time I saw my ex was about seven years ago. He is married now with a son and lives a thousand miles away. I heard from him last November it was just an email. I actually tracked him down because I had a dream that he was going to war and it turns out he is on his second tour of Iraq. I found his email address and sent him a short note just asking if he was ok. He replied telling me he was in Iraq and asking about how I was and that was the last I heard from him. I know he's ok because I check the casualty lists everyday and he's never on it. I also send him e-cards and he picks up the cards but he doesn't write back. I have no illusions of us getting back together but I just can't get over him. Even if I never see my ex again I'll love him until the day I die. I don't want to hurt my bf's feelings I know he loves me and he doesn't want me to go. I gave him some reasons why I'm leaving but he doesn't know that part of the reason is because I still love my ex so much. Part of me doesn't want to go either. If you know the lyrics to the song "If you can't be with the one you love, you got to love the one you're with" I feel like that but I just can't love the one I'm with the way I love my ex. I feel like I will never find anyone who I love more than I love my ex but at the same time I have someone now who loves me and I get along with even though I love someone I may never even see again. Has anyone ever been in this situation? Tell me how it turned out for you. Sat, 28 Jul 2007 17:31:07 GMT dreamy1 http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2143759.aspx Hey again guys. Now I know that the recent kinds of posts that I've been sending lately have little to do with my company, but I figure - why not use a great place like MyLot to get some general answers on topics that I need while I'm here. So heres the question. Recently as some of you know, my Ex and I who I am madly in love with broke up. A lot of people are telling me to give her time. I think that it may be working. But recently I've found out somethings about what she's been up to while we've been broken up that make it discouraging to want her back. However, she has, over the coarse of the day, give me a kick to the back(to get my attention), and a smile. Now I'm not sure why, and I would love to know from experienced lovers to give some advice. She is very stubborn, but to be honest I almost enjoy that about her. Well any who - any advice? Thanks guys, BBP-Studios Mon, 28 Sep 2009 17:59:29 GMT bbpstudios http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1925231.aspx I went out with my sister in law last night and we had some drinks and were talking about everything. Well, we're trying to get our relationship by on track because we hated each other when I came into the picture. So we go out and she's kinda badmouthing my husband about the past to me. I know he was a manwhore to be nice about it but he's not like that we me. He treats me like I'm the world. He's not a cheater. And our life now is perfect. Then she tells me when we were dating that 2 months after I came in the picture he brought his ex to her house for her daughters b-day party. I don't get mad. The past is the past but I wanted to know if it was true. So I get home and ask him and he gets pissed off! He was like NO that's not true. When we started seeing each other I was already in love with you. I fell in love with you the first time I saw you and you wouldn't give me the chance. I wouldn't mess this up. That was fine. But now he wants to tell his brother and get her introuble with him and I asked him not to so he won't. But he's pissed off and we got into an arguement. I keep telling him it's not a big deal. I don't care. Well she also said that he's family is still on edge about me because they feel I don't take care of him. We've been together 2 years married for a year and a half. Now that hurts my feelings. So I told him that too. And he's going to ask them. I'm sorry but I do take care of him and our new baby girl! I don't work but being a full time mom to a 6 week old and now his 15 year old daughter who is a hellian is a full time job! I don't like to cook. I can cook but I don't like to so he does, and he doesn't mind. But they are traditionalist. Well, I'm sorry. I'm not. We don't put everything on one person, we work together. I clean this house, take care of the girls, do laundry, dishes, ect... I barely have time for myself. Even when he's here because he worked all day and I want to give him a break. Would you get mad if you were him too? Is it right, if it is true, for his family to feel this way? Any other advice or opinions? I feel like I was in the wrong for asking him and now I wish I never did. But like I told him, I've always been able to talk and ask you anything and you not get upset...I can't believe you're acting this way. :( Sat, 28 Feb 2009 15:35:15 GMT Super_Mommy http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2142814.aspx Hello again friends. I am in a situation where I have discovered that my ex is my love. I can't imagine myself with out her. She broke up with me for obvious reasons but said that we would be getting back together once she cleared her mind. However, in my anger, I said some hurtful things to her and as a result she said that she could never forgive me and that we could not get back together. I want to show her that I didn't mean what I said. But it seems as though the more I try and show her that I care, the more she doesn't want me back. Many of my close female friends have told me that I have to give her time. So this what I have done. I went two days with out talking to her and I've already realized on reason why I want her back. "I could always talk to her about the stresses in my life and she would always listen," is what I've learned. I miss her every day. But the point is that on the third day she called me. She lets me know about her friend who buys her food, and is basically taking care of her. She has told me in the passed the she doesn't want him, and even he himself has informed me that she doesn't want him a couple days ago. Even still, when we broke up she started drinking, and she lets me know of these occasions, I truly hate this about her. But I let her know that I couldn't do anything about it(I told her in a calm way and she agreed). But her reactions are not the same any more, it's almost as if she is wanting to feel her pain. I try to act as though it doesn't bother me, because my close advisors tell thats what I should do. But for some reason I feel as though she is trying to send me some sort of sigh, as women often do. But I'm incredibly confused. Every day I know that she is with him, she is hurting herself, but what can I do? She's not my baby any more(Yes I am a guy). When we where together I did what ever I could to protect her, but now I don't know what I can do to keep her safe. Even still, she's acting as though she doesn't want to be kept safe. To be honest though, I think that giving her time may be helping the situation. But I don't know how long to give. I love her to much to keep letting her hurt herself. I need experianced advice. DON'T GIVE ADVICE ON HOW TO LET HER GO. PLEASE, THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M ASKING. Thanks Guys. Sun, 27 Sep 2009 12:43:13 GMT bbpstudios http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2133254.aspx One of my younger cousins goes out to her neighbors house to ride horses with their daughter who is the same age as her. My cousin ended up getting a crush on her friend's older brother who she used to see around when he would be up to visit his family. She was 18 and he was 26 when she first met him. In any case, she told her friend's mom that she wanted to go out with her son. News traveled to the guy and he told her he thought she was a nice girl but that he woudln't feel comfortable going out with someone so much younger. About a week or two after he found out that the girl liked him, it was his younger brother's big Birthday party. The guy knew my cousin was going to be there. (she is the same age as his younger brother and 2yrs older than his sister who he used to ride horses with.( My cousin had told me that the guy she had a crush on showed up with his girlfriend who he had never brought around before. In fact, she did not even know he had a girlfriend. This made my cousin sad as you know how young girls can get when they have a crush. About 3 weeks after that, the guy asked out my cousin. She inquiried about his girlfriend and he told her they broke up and he decided he wanted to go out with her that the age difference didn't matter. They were going out for awhile and she was very happy. Then, some shocking news was revealed. His ex girlfriend is a few months pregnant to him. He had not told her the ex girtlfriend was pregnant. And my cousin found out that he didn't exactly break up with his girlfriend to be with her. What had happened was that his ex told him to grow up and shake up or get lost (in so many words) when she got pregnant. He had chose not to step up and so his ex more or less broke it off with him. My cousin is in love with this guy and says those things don't matter. But I feel like he is or was using her. It seems as if he ran to her after he didn't get his way with this ex. I remember back when he was stil withh his ex and brought her to that party. My cousin had been so sad because she said he made it more than clear that he was with his girlfriend and in love with her. Personally I feel like he treated both my cousin and that ex terribly. And why did he hide that he is going to be a father? I Wed, 16 Sep 2009 08:11:08 GMT kcareconnections http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2037975.aspx So... I'm getting married in 7 days!!! My Fiance and I will have been been engaged for a year on the day of and planning has been both hectic and fun. Before our engagement we had been dating and living together for over 3 years. We even dated in high school before that, so I definitely know that he is the one. We get along very well, we don't fight all that often except the occasional venting of steam. We have generally the same goals in life and many things in common. I have never felt more at home, or more like myself than when I am with him. So why is it that I am scared shitless???? Any suggestions from those that have been through this; are going through this; have been married for years; or have had unsuccessful marriage(s)... I'd love to hear all about it! Sat, 13 Jun 2009 12:48:08 GMT Jcnelle